InSpiritry

A recent visit from my son, who is particularly insightful about human interactions, reminds me of the power of really listening–something families are often too busy or too bossy to do well. I have long known that family life, as well as spiritual living, calls us to seek to understand others. This past week, my son reminded me that we cannot do that if we are consumed by talking, studying, working, thinking, writing, playing, TV watching or even serving others.

The ability to suspend our personal agenda and offer our attention to someone else is, in fact, in itself a great personal act of service. When we really listen, when we offer our attention, we affirm the importance of the other person and their experiences and values. In that way, the unselfish act of listening is a first step towards of acknowledging the importance of the Greater Good. By listening, we admit, “It’s not just about me!”

To do that, we must listen passionately. What is Passionate Listening then? Like all passions, it is born of intention and rewards us with inspiration. When we listen passionately, we bring the full force of our energy, our concern, our intellect and our spiritual presence whether it is to prayer, to meditation or to conversation. The outcome is a much fuller experience of our relationships, our self concept and our spirituality.

Reflecting on my own occasional neglect of attentiveness, I decided to apply InSpiritry values to the practice of listening. Here is the result. I hope it is helpful:

A Listening Community - Each of us needs a personal circle of people who will listen to us not as judges or juries, not as advisors or adversaries, just listeners. More important is for us to see when we can be a member of that listening community for the people in our lives. For many of us, God is the ultimate listener — are we listening to him?

Com-passionate Listening - The best listener listens with compassion. And what better tool for making peace? Reconciliation  and healing depend on our hearing and understanding the experiences and perspectives of the other person. A frequent source of conflict begins with the phrase, “You don’t know anything about me!” The best answer is, “Then tell me. I’m listening.”

Creative Listening - Creativity is the act of seeking a new way. Listening creatively means looking for innovative ways to facilitate intentional conversation. We may need to change our family routine, save a space in our schedule or seek peaceful places to allow our selves to be transformed into passionate listeners.

Collaborative Listening - Syngergy, the power of our combined efforts, begins with the sharing of ideas among people who are listening to one another. When it comes to problem-solving, the corporate world has long heeded the proverb, “two heads are better than one,” but sometimes in our personal lives we forget the treasure of wisdom held by others. Collaborative listening allows us to share our problems and listen for solutions.

Listening for Consilience - Consilience, the InSpiritry idea that all knowledge leads us back to universal truth, will only be evident to us when we are actively listening. When we listen intentionally, we can begin to perceive unrecognized connections, patterns, repetitions and convergences. New information is networked to what we already know as we grow in wisdom. It’s true: we must listen to learn!

Courageous Listening - This is perhaps the most difficult kind of listening. Listening becomes a courageous act when we force ourselves to hear what is disturbing: the grievances of a family member, the accusations of a coworker, the suffering of those in need, the recount of our misdeeds, the disappointments of those we love. Passionate listening sometimes requires passionate courage!

The Celebration of Listening - As we seek to develop our passion for the Greater Good, our lives can become a celebration of listening. We can make opening our hearts (and ears) to the stories of others a daily practice of personal InSpiritry!

Listening is, indeed, a mighty act of humanity. I hope you will join me in recommiting to being a passionate listener: to set aside time and space for conversation, to give other people our full attention, to accept the painful with the pleasant, to see connections between other people’s experiences and our own, to use listening as a tool for problem-solving and compassionate living, to celebrate the gift of language and listening!

Special thanks this day to my son, who with his brother and sister, continue to teach me how to live an InSpirited life!

Be a Blessing - Learn to be a Passionate Listener!

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This entry was posted on Saturday, August 18th, 2007 at 11:44 am and is filed under InSpiritry, Anne McCrady, Greater Good, InSpiration, Peacework, Family, Spiritual. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.